Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?
Last Updated: 02.07.2025 07:07
It’s here now, writing to you.
You are like me, then.
This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.
Vitamin D: The best time to soak up sunlight without hurting your skin - Times of India
The sadness was still there.
Be who you already are.
When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.
Which daily habits can help you keep a clear and positive mind?
So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”
But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.
What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.
What sorts of music do cats respond to?
I had run out of hope.
It’s still here.
I was tired of trying and failing.
You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.
Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.
For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.
Why are Boomers so vehemently opposed to student loan forgiveness?
Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.
It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.
So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.
But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.
Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.
What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.
Mario Kart World Is Not An Open-World Game, Nintendo Says - GameSpot
Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.
It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.
In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.
It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.
I was tired of fighting.
And the sadness?
The #1 Dessert to Help Lower Dementia Risk, According to Dietitians - EatingWell
It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.
Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.